i was gonna burn up the race track on Sunday morning. reached the venue for the Nike Human race Traning Run venue looking like a real pro in professional running gear, sunglasses, my ipod touch. as newbie type runners and older people threw envious glances in my direction, the golden tints from my hair shone.
the run started off with me in the front row (having positioned myself there strategically by chatting with the guys from racers toolbox). we ran on cobbled stone paths along the river.
soon the sun was out in full glory and the others were starting to catch up...i decided to put in that little bit extra to propel myself just a wee bit faster and as i did so, i felt something stir inside me...something deep, primal and....smelly
could this really be happening? i needed a fire in my stomach, but the only one i could summon was this? i ran harder pushed forward by the need to be near civilisation and amenities. but the harder i ran, the more it burnt
the cleaners at the pub area were just about finishing with their morning duties, cleaning the place of the bacchanalian detritus from the previous night when i reached, unaware that i was about to render all their effort and toil meaningless.
and i did...three kilos of pushing and heaving, six presses of the fancy flush button and ten minutes from a twenty minute run later
and as i left the toilet i left behind me three things- my bravado, a stench that reached high heavens and my position in the run. i finished last but i had gained for myself one thing which made it all worth it- a sense of satisfaction so deep it came from my stomach
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